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Certified Lover Girl

Disclaimer: Don't be bitter, be happy.

“Love is so beautiful and multifaceted.” - Xonecole

February is the unofficial month of love and the 14th is the one day out of the year that your lover better show up and show out. A lot of people do the most for this day, while some people spend the day being bitter, and some people can’t financially afford to do anything. No matter your relationship status or feelings about love I’m encouraging everybody to be positive on Tuesday, and if you can't, don't get on social media and avoid retail stores, restaurants, and any environments that remind you of love. Auntie Tab said it best, “Have a good day, and if you can't, don't go messing up nobody else’s.”

To y’all surprise I love love and Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday. Yes, it’s a man made holiday and arguably it’s an overrated, but I’m lowkey a hopeless romantic and lover girl therefore anything regarding love reels me in. Plus I grew up in a household where my dad made Valentine’s Day a big deal for my mom and me. My favorite two gifts from my dad was a teddy bear he got me when I was a kid (I still have it) and as an adult he gave me an Amazon gift card one year and I ordered 5 books to my book collection (I’m a book fiend).

I’m grateful that my dad set a standard for this day, but due to my inconsistent love life I’ve learned to look at this holiday as something deeper than romantic relationships. It’s an opportunity to love and show love to the people you care about the most whether it’s your parents, your significant other, your kids, your homegirls, etc.

Personally, I’m ready to see the girls getting their things. From the fly outs to the luxury gifts to the roses wrapped in hundred dollar bills.

I’m ready to see the Galentine’s events this weekend. (I had Galentine’s plans, but bartending is in high demand this weekend.)

I’m ready for the solo dates and women spoiling themselves this year.

I'm ready to see and embrace a day of happiness in this unhinged world.

Ideally I think everybody should find a way to celebrate this year whether it's this weekend or on Tuesday. Here’s some ideas whether you're single or in a relationship.

Single Ideas

  • Galentine’s event. Host a PJ or charcuterie board party, go to dinner with your girls, and if gifts are your love language do a gift exchange with a friend. Showing love to your friends is important.

  • Solo Date. If you don’t want to be around your friends I suggest you enjoy a solo brunch or make reservations at an upscale restaurant for dinner. You can also treat yourself to a spa day, plan a Valentine’s Day photoshoot, go to a selfie museum, visit a winery, paint & sip, enjoy a stay-cation, or go on a solo trip. Tiktok has other ideas if none of these interest you.

  • Spoil yourself. I’m such an advocate for this one. Nobody knows what you like more than you know yourself. Buy yourself something nice whether it’s flowers, a purse, your favorite perfume fragrance, sexy/silk pajama set, etc.

  • Speed dating or single events. Get on eventbrite and find an event for single people such as speed dating. Depending on which city you're in there’s numerous events for single people to attend this weekend or on Tuesday.

Couple Ideas

  • Upscale dinner reservations. You can never go wrong with a fancy dinner date. Due to the high demand please make reservations and try a new restaurant that you don’t typically eat at. Steakhouses are a great option, and this is a great opportunity to put that shit on and take some fire pictures.

  • Photoshoot or Couple Massages. Capturing love on camera may be corny to some people, but couple photoshoots are cute and it’s a great way to spend quality time together and capture black love at its finest. Massages are also a convenient way to bond and relax together

  • Getaway. No matter the budget you can always book a hotel (not a motel) in your city and set it up with balloons, candles, gifts, etc. You can plan a weekend getaway in another city within driving distance or if you got big money you can fly to another city or book an international trip for y’all. As long as the getaway includes a nice hotel and sex it’s bound to be a lit time.

Now let’s talk about gifts. One reason people view this holiday as overrated is due to the pressure put on men to buy a quality gift. I do agree that it’s unsaid pressure which reminds me of how other people expect others to do the most for them during the holidays which isn’t fair seeing as everybody's finances are different. Personally, I’m not a gift lover and I prefer quality time over gifts but if gifts are important to you then you should ask for something and your partner should make an effort to buy you something.

Now although I’m not a gift lover I still expect and let whomever I’m dating know that twice a year (Valentine’s Day and birthday) I want a quality gift. Be honest with yourself, be considerate of your partner's finances, and buy gifts accordingly.

Here’s some gift ideas for both genders.

  • Perfume/Cologne. You can never go wrong by making sure somebody else smells good. Ulta, Sephora, and major department stores have great options. For women I recommend Burberry Her Eau De Parfum and for men Armani Code. Also Tiffany & Co has a his and hers perfume set that gives off power couple vibes.

  • Jewelry. Men love watches and women love rings, earrings, and bracelets. For women I highly recommend something from Pandora, they have great gift sets for different budgets.

  • A Purse. Most women love a tote or small handbag whether it’s Telfar, YSL, Steve Madden, etc. Know your price range and buy a bag from a brand that she likes.

  • Basket full of his favorite items. Only you know what your man likes so get creative and put together a basket or pay somebody else to design a basket. For example, somebody’s son loves brown liquor so I could buy some mini liquor bottles and design him a basket or get his favorite bottle of liquor decorated and personalized.

  • Shopping spree. Women love to go shopping especially when somebody else is paying the tab. This option is giving you’re too lazy and inconsiderate to think of a gift that she would like so you settle for giving her your card or taking her to the mall to pick out her own gift. However, if your girl is picky and you're not good at gift giving then I would still recommend a shopping spree.

To anybody reading this you have three days to buy some gifts and make some plans for yourself or with your homegirls or lover. Due to the industry I’m in I’ll be bartending all weekend and Tuesday night as well. However, I’m looking forward to getting cute and taking myself to brunch and if I have time I’m going to get my nails done and go to a selfie museum. I’m not sure what my dad is sending me this year, but I hope it’s some money and a card, and lastly, out of state bae is still in my life so I'll be getting something from him as well.

I hope y'all have a lovely weekend and take this weekend and the rest of this month as an opportunity to show and spread love. The world needs it.

“Valentine’s is such a beautiful day and people make it so bitter just because they have no date. Bruhhh, buy your mom, sister, bff, homegirl flowers. Take your homies out to dinner idc. Love is love.”

Positive news: Your girl got approved for an Amazon storefront and my store has some great Valentine’s Day gifts for last minute shoppers.. Please checkout my store and shop with me.

Make sure your following me on all social media platforms including

Tiktok: erica_nicolexo

Outside of Valentine’s Day it’s still black history month, and this week's promo is Sweet Cookie Wash which is a black owned feminine hygiene company. All of these products have no chemicals and they’re great for keeping your cookie clean and smelling fresh. I love the cookie wash and cookie oil. Visit and use referral code ERICANICOLEXO.

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