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Living the single life

Updated: Apr 8, 2020

Over the past year, a numerous amount of people have questioned me about who I'm currently dating. I usually let them know that I'm not dating anyone serious right now. Most people response is "Aww, why not?" or " Your pretty, I know somebody is trying to talk to you." At this point during the conversation I find myself getting annoyed, every time. I get annoyed because I have to explain why I'm single as if being single is a bad thing. I take a deep breath before I response and I tend to tell certain people my reasons for being single and some people get the short answer of "I'm just not dating right now." I'm not opposed to dating, but what I've experienced during the "talking phase" with some guys has turned me off from the dating scene. With that being said, I'm content with being single until Mr. Right comes along.

"I think it's very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not defined by another person." -Oscar Wilde

In this generation, quiet a few people don't understand that it's possible to be single and happy. It often comes off that if you don't have a man then your life isn't fulfilled. Let me be clear that many people are single because they want to be. I personally, keep choosing to be single because what's being presented to me isn't good enough. I don't want someone that believes in situationships. I don't want to date a liar or a cheater. I basically don't want to deal with a man that is going to be a burden in my life instead of being an asset.

Here's some valid reasons why people should be single at some point in their lives. One reason is based off the quote by Oscar Wild which is people need to learn to be alone. In order to be happy with somebody else, you must learn to be happy by yourself. You can't expect somebody else to make you happy if you don't know what it takes to make yourself happy. Use this alone time to self-reflection, do the things you love to do, figure out what you want for your next relationship, etc. Also, it's not healthy to be co-dependent on somebody else for your happiness. Hence, couples that are like velcro typically don't work out because they are too reliant on each other for emotional wellness. Another reason to be single is because it's better than being in a false relationship. A lot of people are in relationships because they don't want to be alone. People tend to think that having a man/women will fill a void within them but it doesn't. Additionally, people don't want to start over with somebody new, but that's a better choice then being unhappy in a relationship.

Bottom line, date if you want to, but date for the right reasons. Be single if you want to and don't let society make you feel bad about it. I've been single since October 2015 and I'm enjoying doing me. There are so many other great things going on in my life besides entertaining the dating scene. Yes I get lonely at times but I'll be damned if I'm going to hop in a relationship or deal with a guy that's not right for me.

Lastly, if your single and waiting for the right person to come along surround yourself with people that understand. Nothing is worst then people trying to force or convince you to do something that your not interested in doing right now. Stay strong and remember all the reasons why you've chosen the single life.

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