Updated: May 4, 2022
Disclaimer: This is my blog & I’m going to always say whatever TF I want to say. If you read this and you get offended oh fucking well. This post is meant to be funny, while giving some people some honesty about their financial choices and unrealistic expectations of others.
“I need some money nigga, the fuck I’ma do with $200. What’s not clickin’ Steven? Cashapp me right…hurry up.” -Summer Walker
Y’all I haven’t been this worked up in months. I was so pissed off last week to the point that I had to tell the close friends on IG, talk to 2 of my bffs, call my mom, & drink 2 glasses of wine to calm my nerves (mind you I don’t even drink like that anymore). Within the last month quite a few people have asked me for some money, and I’m very confused on why they’re asking me. Do I look like an ATM? Fuck no.
After talking to a few people I noticed that other people are going through the same issue with their family and associates asking for money which is why I’m speaking on this. And for the record I know what it's like to be broke and thankfully my parents have always been able to help me. I do feel like borrowing or needing help from your parents is a different story. Your parents created you and any good parent has unconditional love for their child and they’ll do whatever they can to help you. However, the rest of the world doesn't fuck with you like that, which is why you should be mindful of your finances, and don’t have unsaid expectations for your friends and family to be giving you money whenever you ask for it.
Here’s some things to consider for all the people who are always asking for somebody else’s money.
Why do people always need $20? I’ve noticed the magical borrowing amount is always $20. First off inflation is real so realistic what are you about to do with $20? Secondly, somebody refusing to give $20 doesn’t warrant facebook statuses and rants about fuck family and friends...it's literally just $20.
You're NOT entitled to somebody else’s money. I don’t care if I told you no today and you see me flying to Dubai tomorrow, no means no. Plus it’s my money to spend it however I want to and what does that person look like explaining to you why they can't give you THEIR money. Get your money up so you can spend yours however you want to.
The only time you speak to some people is when you want something. It’s rude and classless to only call somebody when you're in need. How dare you never call to check on them yet when you need some money you magically know their number now. Honestly, you should feel type of why that every time your name or number comes across somebody's phone they already know you're calling or texting them for some money.
Females, if you're married or have a man, why are you asking other people for money. The only thing worse then one person asking for money is a couple or somebody in a relationship asking for assistance. Y’all have 2 incomes please tell me why you're asking a single person for help. Also if you can’t count on your man for help it might be time to get a new one sis, same rules apply for men in relationships.
You’re not close enough to this person to be asking for money. My rule is if i can’t count on you for nothing or you’ve never been to my apt. or birthday events we’re not close enough for you to feel comfortable asking me for anything. My closest friends know if they need something I got them, but the rest of y’all shouldn’t even build up the courage to ask for shit.
Instead of asking for money you need to figure out how to make more money or have a minimalist lifestyle. People helping you isn’t going to solve your long term financial issues. In my opinion it’s better to teach somebody how to make money than always being there to go for some money. I’ve watched my parents give and give to the same people and as long as you keep saying yes they’re going to keep asking.
If you're always missing work or doing unnecessary bullshit you should know better than to ask for your help. Get your spending habits and finances together. I remember wanting to get my nails done vs. being late on my car payment. To avoid a late fee I picked up an extra shift at work. TF I look like asking my mom or out of state bae to get my nails done when I needed to work on being financially responsible. Nothing pisses me off more than a lazy person missing work yet a few days later when their check is short they’re asking you to help pay their bills. Fuck no.
Take accountability for your finances and choices. Life is expensive so plan accordingly. It’s never okay to get comfort asking or living off somebody else’s income.
If I’ve never asked you for money, or better yet you know you’ve never been in a position to give me money why would you feel like it’s okay to keep asking me. Make it make sense.
Too many people are having kids with no money (this one is going to piss some people off but IDGAF). If you're already struggling, what sense does it make to add another mouth to clothe and feed. I use to feel bad for saying no to people who had kids but if I wanted to be financially responsible for a child I would’ve had my own kid. Honestly, I’ve been in situations where somebody's sons wanted me to have a kid and I promise you I wouldn’t have had nothing to worry about financially. Be mindful of who you have kids with and sex is for grown people who can either afford an abortion or can afford to care for a child (this doesn't apply if your kids father died unexpectedly). This one may sound harsh, but you made an individual choice to have a kid and it’s not the community’s project to financially support your child. I love all my god kids, but at the end of the day I’m not obligated to do nothing financially. I know the saying is "It takes a village to raise a child", well the village has bills and the cost of living isn’t what it used to be.
To wrap it up I’ve given people money in the past and told them to take it as a blessing. However it’s May 2022 and I’m out of blessings for this year, maybe the giving spirit will hit me next year ahaha. Honestly I’m not where I want to be at financially. Until I can go inside the Chanel store and spend 5 bands, I’m not financially stable yet. Until I can afford to take off work for 6 months and not be stressed, I’m not financially stable yet. Until I’m not waiting on payday to get certain shit done, I’m not financially stable yet.
I’m saying all this to say don’t ask me for no money. Not because I don’t have it, but because I have my own financial goals and things to worry about. I have big plans for my birthday month and giving to other people isn’t in the budget.
Also stop counting on other people’s income, take accountability for your finances, and get a hustle mentality. Yes life is hard. I'm a living witness of life being hard. I have Crohn's disease, I had to get myself out of credit card, and last month I went to Urgent Care twice for a different medical condition that led to an unexpected outpatient procedure. Trust me when I say I know that life is hard but that doesn't change the fact that life must go on. When you see me popping my shit just know I did WTF I needed to do to get myself where I wanted to be.
Everything I said was from a loving place, however if you're always asking for $20 it’s time to get your shit together immediately.
"Your must gain control over your money or the lack of it will forever control you."
- Dave Ramsey
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