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Reality Check

Updated: May 3

Disclaimer: I don't support all women, because some of you bitches are very dumb and I mean bitches in the nicest way possible.

"Then she got to trippin' over nothin' yet again." - Bryson Tiller

Most people are lame to me, especially these niggas. However the more some women talk the more I'm starting to feel like a lot of these bitches are lame as hell too.


So the latest uproar involves a girl who said a guy DM her and wanted to send her some money for lunch (rage content in my opinion). Mind you she doesn't know this man. He sent her $30 and after accepting the money she took her grievances to TikTok. For the first time in a long time the comments and stitches passed the vibes check.


Let's get into some of the nuances that made this entire situation lame

  • He sent her a picture of him holding some stacks. Three things, he's either a scam, drug dealer, etc. and wants people to know he has money now, money is his personality, or he's capping. Either way him holding up money was a red flag, and she should've ignored his DM. Also niggas are always in bitches DM whether they're married, broke, have a baby on the way, etc. but that doesn't mean you should be a lame ass bitch and entertain whatever the fuck they're talking about. Few successful situations/relationships starts in the DMs.

  • He sent money for lunch. Not a hair appt., not dinner, but lunch. According to my research the average cost for lunch is $16, so if she added $2 she could've had lunch for 2 days. Better yet she could've had lunch for 3 days if she did $10 a day, and there's a lot of places such as Salata, Chipotle (sofritas bowl be hittin'), & Chic Fil-A that have healthy or good lunch options. And to take it a step further if she wanted to eat at a restaurant most places offer a lunch menu between $10-$25. For example in Houston, there's Mo's Better Brews (vegan spot), The Warwirck (black fine dining w/ business lunch menu), etc. She also could've went to happy hour, ladies stop sleeping on happy hour.

  • She spends $100 on her meals. Fuck how much money he sent her, let's talk about why she feels compelled to blow a bag on every meal. I want my people to free themselves from the mindset of spend a check and get right back. Spending $100 multiple times a week is costly, and the quality of food isn't good enough to be blowing a bag. Also how does everybody else have big back behavior, but she's the one that said every time she dines out she gets an appetizer, an entree, dessert, and 2 drinks minimum, it's giving she's the one with big back behavior (no shade, I cut up when I go out to eat too) .

  • The entitlement. I love that women are demanding more and Shera Seven (sprinkle sprinkle) is doing the lord's work, however feeling entitled to something that wasn't offered is crazy especially when you're not that man's wife or girlfriend. Too many women expect so much upfront when in reality he doesn't know enough about you to invest in you. You have to be a cold ass bitch to finesse a man out of money without doing something that's going to benefit him, even strippers are doing something to get them to spend money. Very few women master the art of being a cold ass finesser.

  • Send the funds back. If the money didn't meet her standards she could've sent the funds back and hit him with the "I'm good love." Keeping the money but still hoping online to bash him is lame bitch behavior.

  • Be clear. Having standards and expectations is fine, but she should've mentioned her expectations before sending her cash app info. Although he mentioned spoiling her, clearly he initially thought she was only worth $30 (I'm not saying she was only worth $30, she's a polished girl until she started talking).

  • Cash app. I still use it from time to time but niggas with a certain amount of money aren't using cash app, they've moved on to Zelle. When he mentioned cash app she should've known he wasn't about to send her some real money.

  • Asking for the people's opinion. Being bothered by people telling her that she's ungrateful is comical. She got online thinking the girls were going to hype her up, but instead she became a poor example of what happens when you try some sprinkle sprinkle/city girl type shit.

  • $30 pick me ass hoes. Those were her words for the women who got on her ass. It's annoying that some women feel like any time another woman disagrees with them when it comes to men that she's being a pick me. For the record accepting money that you didn't ask or beg for isn't pick me behavior. Truthfully niggas gotta stop being dumb and sending unsolicited funds, and bitches gotta stop accepting any and everything from these niggas.

  • It ain't tricking if you got it. If he was trying to prove that he could spoil her he definitely would've sent her more than $30, but this goes back to my first point regarding men taking pictures with money.


Overall, he's lame, she's lame, and the entire situation from the DMs to her asking for everybody else's opinion is some ass lame shit. However, I still decided to speak on it because all of these skits, gender wars, and dating horror story times is negatively impacting the dating scene and making black women look the like stereotype that the media and podcast bros have painted us out to be.


Black love is beautiful and a lot of black women are being loved correctly. I wish that type of content went viral the way these lame ass skits and story times do. But then again any black woman who brags on her man catches hell in the comments from all the bitter betty's and beggy bundies.


Now let's talk about the discrepancy regarding BDB's.

First off a BDB is a big dick baller also known as a high value man. This type of man is top tier and highly sought after. The problem is statistics say most women wouldn't end up with this type of man and I agree to a point. I do think there's not a surplus of BDBs, but I think personality and proximity is the reason why some women wouldn't date or marry that type of man. If you're not in a space where you'll encounter those type of men how else are you going to meet them outside of posting thirst traps on the gram.


Most people end up with a partner that they've been around such as high school sweethearts, co-workers, college relationships, and even the pipeline from bottle girl/stripper to being a gf/wife/baby mama. It's not that some women aren't good enough for a BDB but some women aren't in the environments that BDB's frequent. Furthermore, even if you are around BDBs, personality and other qualities is what's going to separate you from other women.


Get in the spaces where there's BDBs and one of the best ways to do that is to be a get money female. Once again bottle girls/strippers got chosen because they're in an environment full of hood rich men.


Lastly, if all women won't end up with a BDB why do some people get mad at the girls that's okay with going 50/50 or accepting a man that can do stuff for them within his budget. It's reminds me of a paradox when people say you can't have something, then get mad when you stop striving to have it.


Let the girls love who they love and so what if some bitches are delusional. Let them be.

Getting mad at women who want more from a man or getting mad if they're who's okay with going half or accepting a pandora ring (TikTok tea) is crazy work.

I highly encourage everybody to manifest what you want out of life and leave everybody else alone.


The Wrap Up

Per usual I think the original situation was rage content for views and a viral moment, but it was a great topic of discussion for the girls. Then, this situation kind of made me dread the thought of dating. I know social media isn't real and happy couples are thriving in real time but unwarranted skits, opinions, etc. is exhausting and very discouraging for the girls who want to love and be loved.


It may be time for another social detox even though I just did one 2 weeks ago.


"I really think it's best to leave niggas alone instead of complaining about what they aren't doing."

- Tweet from twitter: yes_tojess


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